if i had a voice like morgan freeman i would just walk around the streets following people and pretend to narrate their lives
tumblr has lost its mind.. they're actually giving stuff away though.. at tumblrtreats(.)com
Anonymous
Liam: Oh no guys quick take cover under a table did somebody grab the first aid kit yes good let's hope everybody is okay.
Niall: Must.... finish..... this..... burger..... without.... dropping.... it
Zayn: It's alright boys, this is just a little bump in the rollercoster that is life
Louis: This table is terrible whoever made it sucks now my butt can't fit under it.
Harry: The blue whale is the heaviest animal in the world.
Bee: Hi there friend! How are you today? I'm just doing my job, pollinating flowers and all, no need to be afraid of me, I'm just happy I get to enjoy this wonderful weather with you.
Wasp: Oh hey motherfucker, wanna go? I swear I will kill any cunt stupid enough to get 3 feet near me, I can sting you, and it will be the nastiest feeling you've had in awhile. Buzz Buzz, asshole. Bet that hurts doesn't it? Stupid fuck.
100%: I can text all day. I am a God. Nothing can stop me. I can do whatever I want without consequence.
90%: This is only a minor setback. This is like Bill Gates losing a dollar. IDGAF
80%: 80% still sounds good...plus the little gauge is still pretty full. Nbd
70%: Ok...maybe I can lower the screen brightness. Just a little...
60%: Ok maybe I can lower it a little more...
50%: ......shit
40%: *silently worried* "Hey um friends? Does anyone have a car charger or something? Nbd just a...I mean if you got one that'd be cool...
30%: *getting mad at non-important people texting you* OMG OK I DON'T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT ANYTHING YOU HAVE TO SAY!!! SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!!
20%: GUYS BRING ME HOME NOW MY PHONE IS GOING TO DIE
10%: *texting everybody in phone to let them know phone is going to die* No yeah my phone is dying so if I never talk to you again I love you and I'll never forget you...
5%: Literally WATCHING battery level drop....crying
4%:
3%:
2%:
1%:
*dead*: WHAT IS THE POINT IN LIVING ANYMORE!!!
